Nightmare

I had a nightmare early this morning, perhaps sometime during dawn. I was totally freaked out! I had to say that but having nightmare such as losing your dearest one is so hurting! Damn! I don’t want such nightmare please! Silently, I’m keeping my finger cross and hope that the nightmare isn’t true.

Being superstitious or not, I told mum about that. She said by spilling it out the ‘heavenly secrets’, the victim could just escape from the tragedy! Phew. I hope that believe is true. Yea. I am being superstitious. But if you were in my shoes, you’ll know that.

I had adequate of nightmares. Could I just sleep soundly? I suddenly miss her texts which sent me off to sound sleep with phrases like ’sweet dreams’. Haha. I miss her, don’t I? XD

Oh and I remembered Cindy’s signature saying in Form 4, “touch wood!” Cindy, please scream that out with me every single second. I just have the fear of losing my love ones. I just can’t afford to loose them!

Suddenly, can I fight against God’s will? Why can’t human be immortal?

::LEON HA::

Dedicated to You

When you are down, torn into pieces and burst into pieces, I am not there for you, for I can’t be there for you. I wanted to be at your side but this cannot be possible. Of course if you find another one, I could just vindicate off any blames. I understand.

Just sadly, I miss you. I am counting to November. I miss you.

::LEON HA::

Uncovering a New Page

So I had arrived in Perth for exactly one week which means I am still uncovering a whole new page of my life! Great! Upon arriving home sweet home, I still miss my home at Kuching. Picture this, in Kuching you got adapted to so many things for more than a decade, or exactly 16 years and 10 months. You know which roads and paths would lead you to where, which junctions could bring you to a fabulous kopitiam to enjoy any fare at any time.

The weather was a little cuckoo in Perth. For the first few days it was still tolerable. Then Wednesday and Thursday, if you see me on Facebook and Twitter, I was like a mad blabbing about the scorching summer sun of Perth. Yea! The sun was so scorching that I felt like taking naps every afternoon instead of getting around.

I went for my enrollment session at Canning College on Wednesday. Goody good! It went on smoothly. I need not have to take the difficult English course, instead I am enrolling for EALD! Great! Another thing that causes my adrenaline to junk me up is I am so glad I could take Double Maths course! Yes! I’m taking up Mathematics 3A/3B (Modern Mathematics) and Mathematics Specialists 3A/3B (Additional Mathematics). I do not bother much about my other 3 subjects. As long as I’m getting what I crave! *Cheers*

For the whole week, I’m like a foreigner or tourist? I’ve been travelling here and there, purchasing any necessary needs. I paid Office Work and some other supermarket like Coles a visit to hunt down for any things I need. Oh yea. About transport thing, I am still quite worried about the time arrangement. A little puzzled over the time, the connection and everything. Anyway, should I cast away my worries on a fine Sunday morning?

Damn! I am freakishly missing FarmVille! The Internet access here is still limited as I haven’t got myself a WiFi at home. I am so missing the fun time of planting and harvesting my corps at FarmVille! And the worst part is, my level got detained at Level 35! Not to say about my Cafe World and FishVille! OMG! Seriously I am deprived due to the absence of Internet. *Confession of a typical 21st century teen* XD

ZOMG whatever happened to my iPhone is also driving me crazy. My iPod simply refuses to be charged. Oh FML! Whatever things are happening to them please damn get yourself out of my life. They are seriously driving me insane. Oh FML!

Say, my new contact number in Australia is…

+61413902878

I was thinking of looking for number that ends with 8598, same as my DiGi number. Guess that was mere probability. Anyway, hope that 2878 make senses to me too! XD

I had been wondering these few days. I kept grumbling when holidays seem a little too long and now that school college *I’m getting older XD* commences on Tuesday, I started wondering why my post-SPM break is so short. See, when I did my PMR back in 2007, I had 3 months of holidays and now I enjoyed the mere 6 weeks only! Life’s so unfair right? Blah. It was kinda paradoxical when coming to the similar topic, i.e “When you are having holiday, you crave school life; inversely, you yearn for holidays when boring school life starts to appall you.”

Anyway, I miss all my friends back in Kuching. Ohyea. Ocean of thanks to Tan Yee, Shirley and Kelly who sent me off during my first departure to Perth this year! Thank you guys! And also to friends like Cindy, Zhann, Pauline and Kiki, Shirly, Wei Lin and Jerome who threw me farewell lunches! Thank you people! XD. Now it makes me to anticipate for my November break! XD

Uncovering a new page of life seems a challenging stuff to me. Be optimist and overcome all setbacks positively! I am trying to combat with that though! Come to some sense, Perth should be a nice place! So when I am trying my best to flip a new page of my life, I’m hoping to carry forward all my friends from Kuching alongside with me! Miss die you guys!

Alright, guess that’s all for this post. Long-winded.

Take care people!

::LEON HA::

Stage

That struts and frets his hour upon the stage, And then is heard no more: William Shakespeare said that fame isn’t immortal. It puts off like a candle.

I learned that from Life’s Brief Candle.

In practical, sometimes don’t you think that every soul just crave their own stage? Despite the mortality of fame, people crave it. For sometimes they could simply outshine themselves on their own stage and enjoy the feeling of being lauded and complemented.

It is just the feeling of being appreciated, the pleasure within people crave. Not the stage.

People wants the stage to perform in order to win the applause and the complement. All they ever wanted is that.

Could it be so hard to applause at people’s fabulous performance? Or even simple deeds? Badly done stuffs, they were so noticeable and obvious. And you know the consequences.

Sometimes, somewhere, please just give everyone their moment on the stage, let them be who they are, applause and laud them. You’ll make and see differences.

Oh yea. And I always crave my stage and you know what my true stage is.

::LEON HA::

11 More Days

I was just counting. 11 more days I would be compelled to leave my warm and cosy big bedroom, resist the days without local food such as kolo mee and laksa and lots more for the coming 10 months.

However, little do I anticipate and look forward for my life this year in Perth. A turn in my life? For better or worse. I keep my finger cross.

Just a short post. Did some Photoshop work this evening. Check them out at my Facebook account.

By the way, I need to charge my MacBook Pro. XD

Nites.

::LEON HA::

Farewell for Amanda, Marilyn and Leon

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2010!

*It was very late. I know*

It was only the beginning of the year and many of us are leaving to further their studies, including me. Last week I had an awesome time with my friends, roaming around Kuching City to celebrate our departure. Amanda is leaving for Kuala Lumpur to join Taylor’s College on 7 January. Marilyn accepts the ASEAN Scholarship to further her study in Singapore on 15 January. Oh yea. Marilyn will be in uniform! Haha *cunning laughs*. I am heading to Perth on 24 January to join Year 12 at Canning College.

We first planned to go out as the 5 of us but Nicholas got something up and Francoise substituted him! Alright, we had crazy time camwhoring and taking pictures. So I prefer to upload the pictures. XD.

Amanda, Francoise and Marilyn. The 3 Teresian.

Wei Liang, Francoise and Leon. So we had our lunch at McDonalds, obviously.

Some of us are just reluctant to grow up.

Perhaps we all love Kuching and do not wish to leave our hometown.

There are so much more camwhore pics of Marilyn and Francoise.

Check up my Facebook for more. So lazy to update them here. XD

One of the picked camwhore pics at Boulevard Shopping Mall. XD

Alas, photo of the day: Group Photo! ♥ you all!

From left: Marilyn (Singapore), Leon (Perth), Wei Liang, Amanda (Kuala Lumpur), Francoise (Melbourne)

We all had pleasures and funs. Too high until everyone are screaming ‘Chill!’ to cool everyone down. Haha. Since everyone is going off to different pathway, I hereby wish all my friends all the best in their future undertakings. Till then and we meet again!

♥ friends ♥ forever ♥

XOXO

::LEON HA::

2009 Has Nine Important Events!

The year is drawing to an end in less than 4 hours. This year I was lazy to summarise all happenings month by month. Instead, I’ll list down 9 major events that occurred throughout the whole year which makes me hard to forget.

Event #1: Leon completes his SPM and secondary school!

Yes! I am officially done with SPM and my secondary school! I have gone through harsh times with SPM especially I encountered so many problems. First, I only started my revision only in August and SPM was due in November! I was seriously freakishly afraid of my SPM. When the trial exam was around the corner then, I totally flunked in it. I just hope my SPM result which will be released in March is as fabulous as my PMR result. Keep my finger cross! XD.

One thing I’m glad upon completion of SPM is that I never had to face History, Malay Language, Moral and Civics anymore in my life. Perhaps I’ll come across them one day in my life but I am no longer compelled to study it and sit for examination for those subjects! Cheers!

Secondary school life meant a lot to me. Frankly, compared it to my primary school memories, secondary life taught me a lot. From the freedom I gained, I gathered my courage to venture and explore the society and the world. My school teachers and my school life taught me many things which are definitely a good help in my future! Sitting now and reflecting upon what had occurred throughout these 5 years and the efforts, it was truly memories worth treasuring. Of friends, hangouts and lots more. They are awesome! Simply FABULOUS!

Finally, Leon is now an official EX-HIGHIANS! Cheers!

Event #2: Down Memory Lane – Kuching High’s Major Event of the Year

Due to the fire that razed our school last year, the school was coming out with all sorts of activities to raise fund. Down Memory Lane was seriously one major event in which no Highians could ever forget! Yea. Seriously. I hate to say this but Olympiad Maths Quiz really spoiled the day. The Maths Quiz clashes with our Down Memory Lane! Gosh! I really wanted to experience the whole event from 8 in the morning till 5 in the evening!

And did I tell you that, I even took pictures with some local artists for FREE! See! People usually need to buy tickets of admission into concerts and by fat chance you can take snapshots with them! And I took snapshots with some local artists for FREE and easily! Fortunate me!

Event #3: Leon gets his first iPhone!

Thanks Dad and Mum! I got my first iPhone! I had cool and fun time with the phone and busy like hives of bees exploring the versatile phone. Cool! I am freakishly and irrevocably in love with iPhone. Haha. A deep and sincere gratitude to my parents, for realising dreams of all teenagers. Thank you God for blessing me!

Event #4: Sadly, Leon loses his maternal grandma!

In January, I lost my maternal grandma. She left us after battling with Parkinson diseases and cancers for merely 5 years. I guess her departure was a good thing. At least she could rest in peace instead of battling every second of life with those irksome and cruel diseases. Although I did not spend as adequate time as I spent with my late paternal grandma, I did what I should do as a grandson. I love her too as my grandma and I shall miss her.

婆婆，安息吧！

Event #5: Leon has his driving license!

Finally the anticipated thing of a teenager – DRIVING LICENSE! Yup! I had got my driving license sometime in mid-June. After months of lessons and trainings, one kick, I passed my driving! I scattered my mind and forgot who were my passengers already. Nevertheless, I remembered one thing for sure, my best friend, Tan Yee is surely my first passanger! Congratulations too Tan Yee for getting your P license! XD! Cheers for both of us!

Event #6: Leon steps down from Koperasi!

Unexpected, I accepted my retirement from Koperasi with pleasure. I felt bad at first though after 5 years of services in Koperasi. It had really become part of my life and one of the reasons why I anticipated for school to reopen. Life in Koperasi was promised with great chill and fun especially when you got a bunch of great buddies with their unfailing support, namely Bong Sing Xian, Cindy Tan, Daniel Sim, Edmund Lau and Pauline Ho! Oh people! I love you guys!

By the way, we still have one thing left with Koperasi – OUR SALARY!! XD

Event #7: Leon’s family China vacation during Chinese New Year!

As mentioned in my last post of 2008, my dearest paternal grandma leave us without a word. According to our Chinese custom, we were prohibited from celebrating CNY as a form of respect to our ancestor. Hence, our family (including dearest Grandpa, uncles and aunties and cousin) went for an one-week vacation to China! We visited Shanghai, ShuZhou, NanJing, HangZhou and lots more fascinating places. It was indeed a rare opportunity for us to gather together and go for a holiday together! Oh. Such a fond memory!

Lessons learnt: Family is always our priority. XD

Event #8: Leon travels too frequent this year!

I was always missing in action especially during school holidays as my family had to try to fulfill our Temporary Resident (TR) requirement. We were always on the air flying to and fro from Kuching to Singapore and then to Perth. In Perth, I managed to meet up with Jerry and it was a pleasure meeting Jerry and his family! Aww. And I simply could not forget Aunty Rose for throwing a surprise BBQ party for us too! Thank you so much! As for Mark and Kavan, I am so sorry that I didn’t know you guys were at Perth too! Anyway, I’ll see you 2 too next year! And Tyler too! I am gonna see you in person too next year! Can’t wait to uncover my new life next year in Perth! Full of anticipation and hopes!

Event #9: Leon treasures all his friends forever and ever!

I love you guys! Thanks for all the memories! I think by just summarising all the memories we had together in just few sentences is merely injustice! Hence, my blog content labelled ‘Friends‘ are always there for you guys! I love you all and we MUST keep in touch forever!

I shed my tears the moment we left school but little do I believe that our path will cross again! I have faith in our friendship and I shall clench onto it despite we had little dispute and misunderstandings throughout. The true and genuine friendship is the one that does not crash or break despite odds and setbacks!

To all my teachers who have educated me, I love you guys too! An ocean of thanks for educating me and for bringing me through challenges in life. Thank you so much! Again, the mere few sentences are just inadequate but a sincere gratitude with a life-long term is the only thing I could expressed for you all!

Two thousand and nine, 2009 – had been a challenging and wonderful year for everyone, especially economic crisis crashes the whole world. Nevertheless, we all held our hands together and ventured through all setbacks together and together we walked towards the very end, that is today – 31 December 2009!

No winter lasts forever, no spring skips its turns – life is never smooth or harsh at all time. The blends and mixtures of all sorts of things nurture and mould us to be a better person. I thank the year for being another great teacher, offering me lots of valuable lessons I need to treasure in life and carry them with me as I valorously accept the forthcoming challenges in the coming year.

Again, I closed this year epilogue with the same words and phrases:

GOODBYE 2009, WELCOME 2010!

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2010!

And another Photoshop work! XD

:: LEON HA::

Merry X’Mas ‘09!

Let the picture does the saying this time.

I’ll sit down, relax and enjoy Christmas this year!

To all my friends and family,

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

::LEON HA::

The Dark Sky

DARKNESS paints the clear sky with its dark color. The sky is absolutely dark and clear without even a single star shining, neither brightly nor dimly. The moon – it’s new moon. The sky is entirely dark as if nothing could ever pierce through the darkness.

Crossed-leg, he sits on one of the chairs in the backyard. The surrounding neighbours have all switched off the lights except for their bedrooms, dimly lit with faint glowing lamp. His family is snoring away soundly yet little he knows the night is not the time for him to toss himself into the bed. He flips and flops, turns and turns all around the bed but the drowsiness seem never to pay him a visit that night.

The water feature is still running as usual but the fishes are cast with sleeping spells. He is the only breathing soul sitting there, doing nil. He knows that. He is neither freaked out by the quiet and calm surrounding. He fears nothing but he sits there, looking at the sky. Slowly, he decides to let out a sigh, a long sigh.

The night is simply so special. He could not think much about the present nor the future. Certain unforgettable memories of his past are just playing around his mind. He reminisces his friends, the chills and thrills they encountered before together, the pains and the cheers they share before. A breeze sweeps through and it is like a pause button which pauses all the flashback.

He smirks and laughs to himself. Repeating the same sentences, he speaks to himself, “Of such wonderful memories I have with all my friends.“

The wind stops and it resumes the playback. He keeps on thinking but somehow they are so many things he tries to recall but yet to no avail. Overlooking at the clear sky, he wonders if the stars are the guides to aid him to recall things. He does not know. Perhaps that is just a leverage people believes – blindly believes for ages. He shrugs his shoulders and off he continues, swapping of the position of his crossed legs.

The sky is still dark and lonely. He feels like he is the sole breathing soul communicating, not talking but rather the heart-to-heart type. The memories he treasures resume and he smirks and laughs while reminiscing them. He is rather carried away until he forgets the sleeping coat he puts on becomes loose. The midnight autumn breeze chills him up. Stimulated by the cold weather, he realises his loose coat and quickly ties the coat closely together.

He gently raises the cup of coffee in front of him and takes a seep. The caffeine in it is not the factor that keeps him alert, for he knows so sure. He could just throw himself into bed easily even though after cups of coffee after dinner. As alert as a preying fox, he sits still on the chair.

Somehow he seems to miss something. Something so abstract and so complicated or hard to put them in words. He wishes to express his thought but could he? It is not the problem with the language, neither with the surrounding he is in now. Out of a sudden, the dark sky seems to be like a lost galaxy. He is like a lone astronaut lost in the galaxy, hoping to find his way home.

Confused and puzzled, he is in quest of searching something he craves and desires to hunt down. He choose a new moon night and a night of silence and tranquility. He craves the insouciance of night, not disturbed or annoyed by howling engine noise nor irksome motorcycles’ screech. He has everything he gets, yet something is definitely missing. Yes, it is so uncanny and he could not track it down.

He starts to count his blessings. He has almost every thing he desires. Spiritually he is faithful and says his prayers on time. He knows he lacks of something but deep inside himself he feels like jerking out “What in the world am I missing?“

He knows he could not figure out the missing item or perhaps even more. He makes a wild guess, perhaps the thing he has been waiting could neither be purchased by money nor religious practice. It could have been something beyond what we know or perhaps even minute stuff we overlook in every single thing in life.

Impatient though, he still let out a long sigh. He breathes in and out deeply and slowly to restore his tranquility. He knows the treasure is so challenging to unearth. He wishes to crack the mystery by now, as efficient as Sherlock Homes or Nancy Drew or Hercules Poirot. He wishes that too. The cerebrum is overworking perhaps as the breeze is so refreshing, oxygen debt is not accepted as an excuse.

Suddenly, a star just shines dimly in the midst of the darkness. He sees that, the little star, so helpless and lonely, yet it shines as what it supposes to do. He sees through the star, he knows that the star is putting its effort to shine despite the darkness. Despite the moon is missing in action the night, it is still there.

He is such a headstrong. He clenches onto his principle. He rejects the leverage people say. He holds firmly to his own principle and argues to himself that it is the midnight sun. He continues to overlook at it but now from the little parlour outside his room.

Little does he know the answer he wishes to search is about to unearth, little does his sixth sense tells him that. He knows that for he has faith in his instinct.

Yet, he wishes to continue to explore the lonely dark night with a dim midnight sun. He is adamant with his thoughts and actions.

He stands there, laying his hands over the parlour and overlooking the sky with a pair of eyes, filled with hope and faith. Silently, he tells himself, “Someday, I’ll find my way and I’ll find it“.

He knows that… He is sure of that he will find it. It is time that matters.

He knows that…

“I know that…“

Unearthing the mysteries that packs his mind under the lonely midnight sun, he stands at the parlour overlooking the dark sky, again he lets out a long sigh.

“If and only if…” and he never continues after that.

The dark and lonely night drags on and so as the mystery prolongs and remains unsolved. He keeps quiet and speechless after the phrase.

Like a mess, he sighs. This time, as long as the night is. How many night he has gone through this situation, no one knows and neither bother him…

And so he stares at the sky until its twilight again……

::LEON HA::

The Epilogue Closes Well

Can you still remember you were once the jumpy pumpy little kid fooling around in secondary school when you first step in Secondary One? The one that has no worries and just love to make friends, venture into new adventure as we unveil the next chapter of our life.

Jumpy pumpy me was all around in the school cooperative movement throughout the five years, providing faithful and unfailing service to the school. When the school began this year, little did we know that despite all those reluctance, we are soon to bid goodbye again to our school. However, we were still overtaken by the fun and chill with friends, the hyperactive moment in co-curricular. Never ever it flashes our mind that 14 December was so fast, or should I say rapid like thunder.

We went through so many stuff this year especially for Highians. We were the pioneer to organise Kuching High’s Down Memory Lane – our school open day. Never before our seniors did that and all we could do was seek advice around. That was indeed one major challenge we had this year in co-curricular.

People changes. Yup. So friends change sometimes, from time to time. Unpredictable is the word. You might not realise that but for once we could be so close and nice and the next moment something might have prop out. Yet, I know that we are still clenching on the friendship, a bond that we hope it could lasts.

Examinations are definitely our worst nightmare. It plunges us straight to hell when teachers kept on reminding us about SPM or The Malaysia General Certificate of Education. We knew how essential that papers were. Perhaps the jumpy pumpy part of us that still exists within our deep heart core. We were sometimes like ‘Never mind, there is still essential time for revision’. Little did we know that procrastinating was a bad thing, yet we were like daredevils going against time.

5 years is a long time. If you were to ask me to blabber them all out once, I might not be able to do so for so many things coincided and occurred. However, 5 years of High School life has definitely taught me something beyond what is found in our syllabus. High School taught me more about SELF-DISCOVERY, FRIENDS, LIFE and many more. In fact, I guess it is infinity.

For friends, I do hope we can clench onto our friendship and make it lasts forever. We have ventured through hardships and odds together and I sincerely wish that we could carry on with it until the rest of our life. As for rivalry, I have decided to cast it aside, after all we are now all separated.

As for teachers, some dearest teachers who have taught me, I sincerely thank you from my deepest heart. Some of upper secondary teachers who are kind enough to walk pass my life and touch me, they are like Mdm. Lee Wai Fong, Mdm. Ting Yee Ung, Dr. Lau Bee Yian, Mdm. Ting Tieu Wei, Ms. Lim Yee, Mr. Chen Fong Hin, Mr. Eng Bung Chai, Mdm. Hu Sing Min and Ms. Ko Hui Ing. Not forgetting my junior level teachers such as Mdm. Nazrah Maruf, Mdm. Sutinah Mohd. Tahir, Mdm. Tay Moh Teng, Mdm. Chin Chei Vun, Mdm. Norayati Ahmad and lots more. As for some teachers who ain’t so good, once again, also thank you for teaching us, despite you might not be so good. XD

At last, 14 December 2009 marks the end of SPM and also the end of my high school life in Kuching High. Although tears did not fall, little do I know I am reluctant to bid goodbye to the school. However, people has to move on to the future and we cannot always stay putt at where we are. Looking forward to a brighther future is what my school wants all of us to do, and we are doing that.

Anyway, the epilogue closes well with all of us graduating from high school with a proud title called…

EX-HIGHIANS!

ONCE A HIGHIAN, FOREVER A HIGHIAN.

::LEON HA::